This site is a strongly Christian-oriented site, which reviews just about every new film release, and does so on the basis of a series of "moral" criteria, which are:
(O)ffense to God
(see the cutesy way the initial letters spell "WISDOM". Kewl, huh?)
Anyway, Capalert reports can often be hysterically funny: I can especially recommend their review of South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut. So I thought I'd wander over and check them out for a BE review. It only came up today, but you can get to it at http://www.capalert.com/capreports/battlefieldearth.htm
Some of my favourite quotes from the review, which begins:
"I am so sorry that the only movie I could afford to feed to the CAP analysis model this week was this one. There is not much to say about this most forgettable flick."
Not a good start. And this from a reviewer for whom only "Mary Poppins" and "Who gets the House" are sufficiently pure to warrant a 100 score (BE, incidentally, manages 62, which apparently puts it at around PG-13).
"Based on the book written by L. Ron Hubbard (yup, the founder of the Church of Scientology) in 1980 you'd think there would at least be some sort of attempts at planting of beliefs or system of thinking. While there was example of implanting the foundation for questioning omnipotence and omniscience [Rev. 1:8; Rev. 19:6], this movie by the father of Scientology was, I believe, even empty of proselytization to Scientology."
"This movie was like a third grade science fiction writing skills project."
In NTK tradition, then, these are some of the more amusing excerpts from the evaluation of the film on the WISDOM scale: "eating rats raw", "political maneuvers with threats of death", "dissension against tradition causing risk to meager resources of others", "exaggerated male anatomy (clothed) - camera angle to force viewer on private parts" (tsk, tsk), "setting of an example for questioning God's omnipotence and omniscience" (how dare they!).