Donna. on ''Stud is good / slut is bad'' mentality

1. We NEVER had that "right".  Oh, we said we did, and lots of us acted
	upon it, but women have always been looked upon as "sluts" if they had
	half as many sexual encounters that would cause men to be looked upon as
	"studs".  Part of the "sexual freedom" that has been allowed for men has
	been the FREEDOM FROM PERSECUTION for enjoying sex.  (I know, I know, we
	can all point to some rabid feminist who considers all men dastardly
	beasts for daring to enjoy sex.... but really, these people aren't but a
	Vocal Minority of our general population -- and they're easily drummed
	out by all the "Stud is Good" messages we get in about 3/4 or more of
	our world, as evidenced by the high number of men who feel unjustly
	pressured to have sex whenever and wherever they can "get it" (with the
	ASSumption that they will always enjoy it, regardless of the
	circumstances or the person they're with).

2. Lots of us misinterpreted the freedom, and we wanted it for the wrong
	reasons.  I can say this with all sincerity: the one-night stands that I
	had for the RIGHT reasons (meaning: a one-night stand was precisely what
	we both wanted, so no one was fooled, no one was taken advantage of, and
	no one was doing it for any reason *but* to be doing it) were wonderful.
	(As you said, just what the doctor ordered.)  But casual sex just for
	the sake of doing it, for the principle of the thing, to "prove" that we
	could do it and get away with it, to soothe temporary loneliness, or any
	other reason that had more to do with our minds than just a desire for
	sex -- how can anyone truly feel okay about it afterwards?


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