Got some comments in mail (from a scientologist, no less!) and decided
to revise my Lisa McPherson page. So I'm in the process of going
through as much as I can handle of the CPD documents.
This stuff makes me sick. Actually - I think I am in the minority
here, but it is so - I am more upset by reading the interviews than
the autopsy photos. (Ok, I have seen dead bodies up close in less than
pretty conditions before while in med school, which maybe makes a
There's no doubt to me that some of these people really did care about
Lisa. I know some of you think they (the people on watches, etc.) must
have been devoid of empathy, to let her suffer like that. It's an
obvious conclusion, that they were cold-hearted, uncaring, etc. But I
don't think that's the whole truth.
I think they had learnt another concept of empathy, one which is so
far removed from "ordinary life" that it seems incomprehensible. They
had learnt that to be good to another person, to take care of them and
help them, included such things as: not let her talk to her closest
friends about her personal emotions and problems; forcefully insist on
that she be productive at work no matter what; ignore violent
outbursts and psychotic speech (that's "case" and should not be
validated by a response); at all costs keep her out of the hands of
the evil psychs; even to practice PR damage control, not just for the
sake of the org and for saving the skin of staff members, but to some
little degree (at least it's possible this was in the attitude of some
of the people) for Lisa's sake. It is an overt to go insane, to be a
burden to others - something to be ashamed about. The more trouble
Lisa caused for the org, the heavier was her burden of guilt.
You are trained in these things from early on in scientology. TRs
courses to make you not react on strange or upsetting behaviour from
the person in front. The Auditor's Code, saying that the auditor is to
control the session, and not let the pc succumb to his/her "reactive
mind", but push through to the end, no matter how tough it looks. The
paradox of ethics theory that stresses total and utter responsibility
for the individual, without also taking into consideration what is
reasonable or logical responsibility, and at the same time asking the
person to succumb unquestioningly to the ideas and whims of another
Not all these ideas are totally without merit, there are times when
it's invaluable to be able to keep your cool, and when "cruel to be
kind" does apply in life. But as so many other ideas in scientology,
they are far too often taken to absurd extremes, creating a
nightmarish upside-down world.
God, this makes me sick. I'll be taking a few days off.
"Love the truth, forgive mistakes"