huey_vivian asked this question on 4/13/2000:
okay he's my question i left my boyfiend for two weeks stright and then one day me and my friend was in the his car the friends car and he was crying and saying that he would never hit me angain then he left me but he did not want anybody elese he wanted just me in his life but i went back to him the third time around what should i do should i learn to trust him and think things will be okay this time or what?????????????
symonie_2000 gave this response on 5/3/2000:
Wow. You went back to him for the third time. Must tell you something, right? Sure it does. It should tell you that, no matter how many times he hits you, you'll always be faithful and come running back to him the second he sheds a pathetic tear. Men are (supposedly) so stupid to think that we'll accept, but by accepting, you're only justifying that what he did to you was right. And it's NOT. Not in the least bit. You don't have to deal with his stupidity. He's not GOING to stop. How many times is it going to take to make you realize that? It saddens me to see that people in abusive situations don't WANT to leave, because they feel they don't deserve to, but you do. You deserve all the good things life can possibly give you, but you won't be experiencing good if you're still with him. No way, no how. He's only going to become more controlling as time goes on. He doesn't care about you or your feelings. If you stay with him, it'll just be a matter of time until he prohibits you from doing anything that you find enjoyment in. Every individual must live for his/her own self, not for others. No one is supposed to be subjected to another's abuse, which is why we have laws against it. He's broken them by abusing you. That's just like letting a slayer get away with murder. Don't go back to him. It'll be like a dog returning to his own vomit, the trash that was left behind. Once you leave something, behind because of a bad situation, it's left for good. No excuses. If, however, he badgers you about getting back together, I'd say your best bet would be to get an order of protection against him, so he will be forced to stay away from you or he risks jailtime. I wish you'd see how much better your life will be without him. Good luck and best wishes to you...
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